Dear Printer, I'm Sorry

Mounting amounts of paperwork are making me crazy. Like, for real. I feel stressed and tense and I'm furious with the printer. Now, I know when my anger and resentment towards an inanimate object reaches a 10 that I need to take a breather.

So, I started reading old entries in this blog, hoping for a spark of creative, therapeutic something. And, I found it. The printer, and possibly everyone and everything who must come into contact with me today, is breathing a proverbial sigh of relief right now.

When I wrote the following, entry it was the end of my previous academic year. And, I sounded so optimistic. So healthy. So... ready. I need to borrow a little of that Katie's attitude to make it through this last push, and then, once I do - I'll be a graduate student.

Read the optimistic Katie from last year here.

No Gas, No Luck

Apparently today is "No Gas Day," a day meant to show the Powers That Be about how angry we are for having to pay high prices at the pump and how powerful Facebook is as a means of gathering people together for a cause. In this case, the cause is No Gas Day.

The official Facebook page of No Gas Day tells me this:

Simply avoid all gas stations on March 31, 2011. And if you can go one step further, don't even drive that day. Why not let Facebook help us spread the word? However, don't forget your local mom and pop shop. Go IN and buy something that day. Make a point of it!

We're mad as hell, and are tired of watching the big oil companies laugh all the way to the bank while we all suffer. Let's do this! 

Why not let Facebook help us stand up to big oil companies? We never had a chance before Facebook came along!

If only we had Facebook when we were dealing with that pesky wall in Berlin. If only.

In other news: My gas tank is on "E."

Putting the "fun" back in function.

Yesterday, I caught myself admitting that I don’t read anything fun anymore. 

I thought about that admission for a while after I made it and I realized that the fact is, I don’t feel like I write anything fun anymore, either. It seems that while I figured out how to put every ounce of my being into my academic endeavors, I forgot how to write just for me, about things that are funny, or trivial, or just plain old irrelevant. 

This blog was supposed to function as the outlet for that kind of writing. But, alas, work has taken over, and I don't make time for the fun stuff anymore. Or do I?

I mean, I still blog… but it’s for school and thesis stuff. I still use Facebook… but it’s for school and work.

Anyway, I don't want to get too heavy here, 'cause that would defeat the purpose. I just want to say: I’m back.

Fun Katie is back. 

Forever Got Shorter is back. (Though there might be a new title in the works.)

Today, I want to talk about something simple, just to get things going here. 

All I'm going to say is this: Genius. 

Thank you, Town House. 

Amending The Golden Rule

The other day I found myself defending why I spend so much time on other people, and so little on me. Now, I don't mean the selfish kind of time. I mean time spent exercising, writing, reading, paying bills, or cleaning my apartment. Why do these things always fall victim to the needs of others? The short answer is, "I don't know," but the long-winded Katie Version of an "I Don't Know" is this:

Firstly, this is not a good or healthy thing to be in defense of.

I knew it sounded silly when I was saying it aloud; "I just don't have time for me because of work and everything." I knew it wasn't a good argument - but that it just was one. And, even though the person with whom I was speaking didn't challenge the foolishness of my defense, he did appear to ponder it contemplatively, and for long enough that I then began to dwell on it internally.

I don't take care of myself because I'm too busy working? And, what is this "everything" that stands between me and my well-being? Silly, Katie, tricks are for kids.

Making time for one's self isn't always the easy thing to do. Sometimes, it sounds or feels selfish. Other times, it's just might feel a bit boring and solitary. Add, still, other times, it's not even what one really wants to do. I mean, who pencils in "Pay Bills" and feels pumped to be doing it? Nobody.

But, it's for the greater good. Taking care of one's self is part of growing up, part up moving on, and part of the creative process. In order to find time to work creatively on the things that matter most to me - like my writing - I have to make time. I have to wake up early, go to bed late, or take a moment in the midst of my hectic day to jot down some notes. I have to. Or else, I'll fail to be the writer - or even the person - that I want to be.

The problem is, I'm a people person. I'm a helper. I'm a social butterfly. I would choose drinks with friends who need to chat over time by myself. I would choose dinner with a friend I haven't seen in a while over time by myself. I would accompany a friend to an event if they needed me over time by myself. I would take a walk with my mom, pick up a shift, and run errands with a friend all over making time for myself.

I play the role of helper, assistant, encourager, friend, enabler (good and bad, yes) and support system. And, because I have awesome people in my life, they all provide me with the same. However, there are things and tendencies that only I can inspire within me - like exercise and writing and paying bills - and I have to man up and make it happen.

My mother raised me with the mantra, "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." However, I think I've reached a place in my life where the Golden Rule requires some modification.

Do unto yourself as you have done for others.

Make time. Make things. Make progress.