Today's Top Ten

I like lists. If you've been keeping up, I'm sure you've noticed that to be a pattern by now.

I'm not a fan of To Do variety, however. They stress me out.

I like completely arbitrary lists. Like the one I'm about to present to you. Enjoy. Or don't.

Today's Top Ten Things to Be Aware Of:

1. Sometimes, for no real reason, I think I belong in the UK.

2. Even though rain is depressing, the plants in my yard are growing at a relentless pace because of it. It is insane.

3. Tipping is not hard, people. You need not take sub total, tax, or the difference between the two, or the rounded up addition of the tenths of each - or whatever it is you do that complicates a really simple situation. Here's how to ensure you give your server an average tip: Figure out ten percent of the total amount due. Double it.

4. Are we facebook friends? Then you should probably be able to talk to me in real life. If you can't subscribe to this rather simple concept, I am prepared to un-facebook-friend you. So there.

5. Just because Kate of "John & Kate Plus 8" is on television does not make her hairstyle a concept worth envying any more than having eight children is enviable. Just don't do it.

6. Does anyone actually text those ridiculous "text 234567 now with the name of the person you love to see if they love you back" commercials?

7. My horoscope is totally always right. Until it isn't.

8. Every time I turn around, someone is getting married. When I turn back, someone else is pregnant.

9. Newsweek has a new format. I hate it.

10. I embrace sarcasm. Perhaps too frequently, too readily, too easily and without considering if anyone else has a clue.

I'm exhausted. Nearly 13 hours in that old bank building, and another 5 or so tomorrow.

'Night.