I Do... Not

Love & marriage are everywhere.

First, this post.

Then this post.

Followed by, this post.

Not to mention, my brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law are tying the knot in less than three weeks.

I am with my aforementioned & hyperlinked peers on this one; my perspective on marriage is neutral at best, and if I'm really honest about it, it's pretty much straight up negative. Marriage freaks me out.

Luckily, The Girls are all on the same page as I am, so my "I'm 26 and at some point soon one of my best friends is going to get married" bridesmaid duties are nonexistant. (At least for some time.)

In my very serious long term relationship, I used to want for it... and I was barely 22 when we broke things off. Much too young to be thinking about white dresses and last name changes. Much. Too. Young. (Not to mention foolish.)

The ex & I are still close, still very much in touch, and we still see each other, and now it occurs to me how much we've grown, how much we've evolved and changed and I think: Shit. If I got what my delusional & in love twenty-something self wanted, we'd be like the people I know who are my age and already have an ex-spouse. And I know quite a few of those people.

Today I think: If "it" happened, there would be no white dress, no tiered cake, no church, no name change. It's not about the show, it's about the commitment. And, frankly, I think you can get that without all the pomp and circumstance.

For those who think otherwise, feel free to spend thousands of dollars on expensive dresses, invitations, DJs, venues, food, favors, photographers, cakes and honeymoons. Just please make sure you post all your pictures on facebook so my not-yet-hitched friends and I can ooo and ahh over your expense and then take bets on how long it will last.

Cynical & Bitter, party of two? Present.